I always lose socks and I have no idea how it happens. In Vancouver, I was pretty sure the dryer ate them because it was a beast of a machine. But there is no way our puny little tumble dryer here in Lisburn is eating clothes. So where do they go? I buy them in pairs. I fold them in pairs and put them in a special drawer known as my sock drawer. I wear them in pairs. I take them off in pairs. I put them INTO the washing machine in pairs and somewhere between this point and taking them out of the tumble dryer one part of these pairs goes missing. On my last count, which was this morning, I had 11 single socks without their significant others.

WHERE ARE ALL THE SOCKS? And in true Christian fashion, how can I apply this anecdote to everyday life?

Paris in a nutshell.

Eiffel Tower...impressive.

Champs de Ellyses...beautiful

Notre Dame...breathtaking.

Latin Quarter...character.

Amy's Book Shop...Quirky.

RER system...smelly.

Amy's hosting abilities...mama would be proud.

Tree's...that steal hats. Jamaican willow trees.

Late night banter...unforgettable.

Ridiculously early alarms....snoooooooooooooze.

Disney...magical.

Thunder Mountain, Indiana Mountain, SPACE MOUNTAIN...Epic.

Peter Pan...Gey.

Mad Hatter Tea Cups....GET OUT OF THE CUP WITH YOUR HANDS........UP!

Parades and lights and Christmas trees...soooooo good.

I heart Paris. Totally worth the crazy early mornings and rollercoaster back pains and general coldness. A very awesome start to Christmas.

Twilight isn't a love story. It's an obsession story.

I think black Christmas tree's are kind of cool.

I have a playlist of songs on my ipod that I imagine playing in the background at different moments in my life.

The best feelings in the world include sneezing, clean dry socks, fleecy blankets, and a really great parking job.

I fly to Paris in T-36hrs.

Inspired by a green mango.

Reasons not to date me.

1. I will avoid walking at all costs. When I do walk, I will cross the street as many times as necessary to stay on the sunny side despite safety, time or inconvience. Also if I have to send a text whilst walking, I don't know if you could classify it as walking anymore.

2. I will be late to most things. Even without excessive street crossing.

3. There is a wierd collection of piles all over my bedroom due to my inability to put things away where they belong. It's like little magic tidying fairies come into my room each night and pile everything up trying to tell me in a nice way to clean the flipping place up.

4. I love chocolate, frozen yoghurt, nachos and spaghetti but I hate hot chocolate, ice-cream, cheese and pizza.

5. My wedding song will be a Celine Dion song. Possibly one of the french ones. And I will know all the words, pronunciation and all.

6. I'm serious about that last bullet point.

7. There is an ever increasing list of words that I strongly dislike-some are random and some are justified. This list may or may not include words such as nipple, loaf, moist, crusty, embellish.

8. If you say 'ttyl' or 'whatever' or 'wtf' or 'bbz' to me, I'll take it personally and possibly terminate a relationship.

9. I'm really serious about that last bullet point.

10. I spend time writing blog entries on reason why people shouldn't date me.

Christmas is just around the corner and it feels like it. This week has been another funny one, full of ups and downs and surprises and knock backs. It's almost like a busy waiting room. I know I'll be seen to soon, I just don't know how long I have to wait. And in the meantime, I guess I better find something to do instead of getting bored and frustrated.

I don't know about you guys but I don't mind waiting rooms. It's a really good time to plug into your ipod, stop and think and watch the people around you. It's like choosing to walk on a beautiful day instead of driving. Or choosing to stay in on a Friday night. I love to listen to songs that remind me of people or good times, or songs that motivate you or songs that you can make up really good day dreams to. I love to send a text to somebody that I haven't spoken to in a long time or take notes on interesting things around me that I could write about or lately write letters to people who aren't around.

It's a really refreshing experience which is why it's not as bad as I first thought to be in a dip because my peaks gonna come. I'm gonna get the guy, the job and the opportunity that's right for me. I just gotta wait my turn.

"Feels like letting go" Matthew Perryman Jones
"To build a home" Cinematic Orchestra
"Come and Worship" Bebo Norman
"Hosanna" Hillsongs
"Start a War" The National

But that doesn't mean I don't want the doc to hurry up. My on-the-go playlist is going to end real soon!

Awk lawds I suck on the blog front these days. But I'm going to take it serious again. Maybe. It's a little like facebook status updates.....there are too many possibilities and I am no good at making decisions. So I just don't make one. I guess I could tell you about how stoked I am about Christmas or my trip to Paris or my friends hen day or the Backstreet Boys concert on Thu. but why not just write about it when it actually happens. I could tell y'all that this is my 161st post on my blog which is pretty epic. It's my longest relationship ever. I could blog about X Factor but I'm already bored of hearing peeps complain about it. Don't get me wrong, I agree but don't want to write about it.

Which leaves me with Friday night. It's dark and raining. I get out of work 2 hours later than usual and people are annoying me left right centre and all in between. I pull up in my drive way with a long Friday night ahead of me and take a notion to just drive. I grab an overnight bag, my ipod, jump in the car and head towards Fermanagh. Just the process of driving in the opposite direction to Lisburn accompanied by really loud music was the best therapy ever. All you therapy junkies out there....spend your money on a car and an iTunes account instead. When I got to little Lisnaskea I was content. I was able to leave the shit in the back seat for a bit. No internet, no phone signal and only terrestrial TV. It was fantastic and I only wish I could have stayed but Lisburn was calling.

I won't make a habit of wasting petrol but it is what I needed. Amy if you're out there come back and drive with me please.

I'm burnt out and wasted. I'm tired of pacing. Busy erasing voices in my head and knots in my stomach. Everything changed and people became faceless. But I want to replace this wasted attitude. I want to believe that people are good and not manipulating or deceptive.

Have I been a sinner? Yes. Have I been a lover? Yes. Have I been a killer? Yes. Have I been a victim? Yes. This world is completely alien...I want to escape it, or embrace it. I keep re-arranging everything I know, it's the only thing I know how to do. I'm in a strange, strange place but they say that even fools can find their way out of the dark.

Jenson Button is like totally F1 world champion. I'm ashamed to admit that I have still not watched it, but I have been waiting since the tender age of 14 for him to do it. Ever since I first saw him on TFI Friday with Chris Evans, photocopied his picture out of a magazine and stuck it on the inside of my school folder...when I was 14. That was 9 years ago.

Perseverance and Integrity. He totally beat the "man". I love it when the "man" gets beat.

I'm reading a course in youth work this semester. It's what I should have been studying back when I left school. But it's on weekends. Driving to college @ 9am on a Sunday is unatural...I think I saw tumbleweed roll along the Malone Road. And it means that today was not only Monday, but day 8 on the slow moving train to a land of days off.

But this is not the point, surprisingly. On Sat morning, I was asked/forced to answer a sheet of reflective questions. The type of questions everybody hates to think about because you know the answer in your head but not in actual written words that make sense. Why do you want to do youth work? Why do you want to work with young peeps where you do? What are your personal values and how do they impact your youth work?...that's the biggie, my 'personal' values. I'd rather you give me a sheet of calculus to complete. Whilst thinking really hard about the answer, I had to remind myself I was taking an academic course and not group therapy. Had I been tricked???

No. But seriously, and I promise you'll rarely hear me positively feedback on such exercises, it was good. Like suddenly braking in a fast moving car at a big dirty red light. Forced to stop and rethink your speed....what's more important.....getting to your destination quicker or staying safe? I was reminded of what I personally value the most and it helped me realize and understand a little better the reason and the way I react to some things and don't react to others.

And what is it I value the most?

Resilience, Relationships and 2-way accountability rooted in faith and love the best I can.

Sometimes you have to laugh at life. It's a fairly normal afternoon at after schools club (which still needs a name...the board of governor's didn't approve the WHS prep petting zoo), when I look to the door expecting another late parent worrying about a traffic warden sticking a ticket on their beamer. And here's the funny/tragic/sends a cinematic shudder across the floor part....there's my social worker standing in the doorway.

Behind me, there's one kid lying on the floor cause he just fell of his seat, one kid passed out on the beanbags face down after hockey practice, girls hiding from their parents under the tables and Max playing cards with his imaginary friend Ziggy.

The mental image is hilarious I'll admit, and I'm pretty sure my facial expression was comical perfection but there was awkwardness, and a time delay and a little stuttering.

This woman scares me more than my own mother.

Thankfully the next hour went relatively successfully if you delete the lengthy conversations regarding hand sanitizer, anti-bacterials and using dots instead of x's in the attendance records. But the fact remains that this short little lady will haunt me for the remainder of this year and has the power to fire me at any point for any reason....like using an anti-bacterial spray that kills only 99.5% of bacterias as supposed to 99.9%

C'est la vie...