It's time for a hiatus. It's an american word meaning when one is on a break. One might say that Ross and Rachel were indeed on hiatus.For 5 yrs. What am I doing with my hiatus you might be asking yourself....I'm going to Toronto. With 10 young and awesome youths from my home church. This trip was first envisioned back in November and I cannot believe the time has come.

T-7 hours. Just enough time to pack, have a really hot bath, watch a movie and power nap!

There was an articles in the paper today titles "Blog ideas that always generate a buzz". As a relatively keen blogger with nothing very inspiring to write about, I read further and this is what I learnt.

1. Show off samples or case studies of your most impressive professional work.

I am not a professional.

2. Run a contest and give something interesting to you're readers.

I'm on a budget.

3. Create a list of your favorite/most commented upon posts.

I don't like to live in the past never mind force others to live in my past.

4. Give away the marketing secrets that have made your blog successful.

My blog is not successful. This is why I am reading your article.

5. Walk readers through a day of your life.

I want my readers to stay readers.

6. Ask a question everyone else is afraid to ask?

Does Santa Claus really not exist?

7. Tell a story using pictures.

You mean a photo album?

There were 10 little gems of advice but they used so many big important words that I didn't understand. My philosophy is and always has been, if you have to google every other word of an article, don't read it. And on that note, I guess there's nothing much else to say except don't read silly articles in The Times Culture section when you're looking for inspiration. If I lose any readers due to my lack of inspiration I am writing a strongly worded letter using google and an online thesaurus to The Times. And if they give me a pay out, I will host a contest on my blog with an 'interesting' prize.

There is so much I could write about. My time in Castlerock. Leaving for Toronto in a week. The New Harry Potter movie. The repeated Martin Bashir MJ interview I watched tonight. And for the first time I can remember, there are alot of things going on in my head that I can't write about. But I'm not going to mention any of that right now because there is one particular thing that is niggling away at me.

It's a strange thing to struggle with problems by yourself. I used to be such an extroverted person. In a personality test I took @ Urban Promise, I came out at 89% extroverted. Feeding off other people. Always ready to open up to people about what is bothering me. I trusted people easily.

extrovert; (adj) a personality type characterized by individuals being socially cooperative and liking others. Extroverts are generally outwardly expressive, active, and readily engage in social activities.

This just isn't the case anymore and I'm working through it, trying to figure out whether my personality has in fact changed or if it is something to do with the people I'm feeding off. And that is certainly not an offensive comment, it's a legitimate question. There has to be a reason that all of a sudden, after 23 years of life, that I look forward to time alone and need increasingly more time alone to re-energize.

Even spending time with my laptop is draining my will to stay awake. So I'm going to go and enjoy some time alone.

It has come to my attention that more people than I thought are aware of this little inter-blog on the interwebs. It got me to thinking 'Why do I blog anyway?'. Why have I continued to spend time writing posts for over a year when, as far as I was concerned, I'm the only one reading them? Am I self-centred?

I hope not. I see people and organizations around me keep blogs on what they're passionate about whether it's photography, food or missions and it is a way to keep track of those you can't interact with regularly. The same way fancy people write columns in fancy newspapers and magazines, I write in this little blog. I would much rather read my friends opinions on certain things than somebody I don't know and somebody who does it just because it is their day job. My blog is just a platform to practice the way I write, and to reach a wider audience when I am passionate about a cause or a movement or even a television show! Writing makes me happy and blogging is a way to express myself. We live in a world where we have so many ways that we can express ourselves....music, movies, fashion, writing, dancing, what we study, travelling, volunteering, photography. Why not use these things in positive ways?

And speaking of passion for a movement...a good friend I met in Vancouver has just embarked on an exciting mission to Africa. This guy had a huge impact on my life, mentoring me through my time at Urban Promise and it makes me really sad that its been so long since I've been able to hang out with him. He was supposed to take this trip last summer but it fell through rather last minute but now it is happening, in perfect time and he is keeping a blog of his adventures. So check it out http://jwongs.wordpress.com/

SM09 is over. Done and dusted. And I miss it! Summer Madness is a Christian festival that I always go into with a negative attitude and leave skipping singing cheesy worship songs and loving life and blessing everybody that walks past. God is a funny one! He watches me walk into the festival complaining about everything and everyone, lets me fester for a little while, listens to me talk about it with all my fellows and He knows exactly what He's going to spring on me!

In all seriousness, the festival was fantastic. It was a great time for team building with all the camping, and the long lazy afternoons. I was able to re-connect with the friends I wanted to, my relationship with the young people going to Toronto in 16days was strengthened, attitudes were transformed and God challenged us to find the respect we'd lost temporarily. It was a very personal experience for most of us and we were able to share it together and that is why God is good. The same way a soccer player sets up the perfect goal, God sets up the perfect situation for us to respond to Him, to confront Him and to let it all go for Him.

I will never be able to watch Harry Potter or eat honey, berries or cream without thinking of everybody at SM09. I will avoid taking down tents in large groups and I will never be able to hear an australian accent without thinking of paedophiles. Clean-up rota's are in my Top10 most hated things in the entire world ever and I will never get over not being able to eat Crofty's mums chicken bake on the first night.